Varmint Hunters Forum banner
1 - 11 of 11 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,370 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Last night, my wife and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her,

"I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and

fluids from a bottle...... If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

She got up, unplugged the TV and then threw out my beer.

...She's Such A Bitch.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
751 Posts
I told my wife that I'd like to be creamated. She was to put my ashes in an urn and put them up on the mantel....

She said that that was likely to turn off whoever her new boyfriend was!
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
1,296 Posts
My wife and I split up.............

She told me we couldn't afford beer anymore and I'd have to quit.

Then I caught her spending $65.00 on make-up. And I asked how come I had to give up stuff and not her.

She said she needed the make-up to look pretty for me.

I told her that was what the beer was for.

I don't think she's coming back.

-BCB
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
182 Posts
Worst of all

My wife told me I got one wish for our wedding night. She said it could be as kinky and wild as I wanted. No questions but after that night it would be never mentioned again. Sooooooo I figured I test the waters and ask for a threesome. Was i shocked when she agreed. She said the only catch was she got to approve the other GUY first. Needless to say That never happened.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
411 Posts
well mine said "I could have sex this weekend...

I asked if she was gonna be in the room this time!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,243 Posts
I try to help

I always tell her when I think the grass needs mowing.

Gotta' go get my laundry out of the dryer.........
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
321 Posts
Well.....When the SgtMajor and I got married.....

I was enroute from Infantry School to my Primary Course.

I refer to her as the SgtMajor cause she is the Top Kick in this house.

Anyhoo....there were 64 friends and family invited to our small wedding in a small country church. Over 300 showed up. Most were there to see if she was actually going to marry me. :eek:

Now, 36 years later, she is often asked how it is she hasn't shot me yet.

Her standard reply is simple: "Why put him out of his misery?":D

Ya have to love her. It not legal to chain her up in the back yard.:rolleyes:
 
1 - 11 of 11 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top